Grace was worried about her mother from the moment that she found her on the floor three months ago. She had gone over to visit her and found her mother on the floor by the kitchen, having lost her balance while getting up from the table. She had been there for three hours and after some convincing, she had agreed to move into an assisted living community.
Grace wasn’t thrilled about this because her mother wasn’t thrilled, but she didn’t know what else to do. She wanted to make sure that her mother was safe while at home and this was the one way she felt that was possible.
Grace helped her mother pack up her belongings, put many boxes and furniture into storage so that she could sell the house to help pay for the assisted living facility, and then she helped her mother get settled into her new room.
It turned out that her mother knew a couple of the women who lived at this community (she had lost touch with them a long time ago and had no idea they were at this facility). Still, Grace wanted to spend as much time as needed to help her mother settle in.
The issue here was that Grace was keeping her mother from getting out and involved in different activities during the day. Grace would go home at night and then come back in the morning, spending the days with her mother. They went down to the restaurant to eat, then they would sometimes stroll through the grounds together. Then they would usually go back to her mother’s room.
Grace thought that her mother was avoiding going out and visiting with other people or activities. In fact, Grace’s mother was entertaining Grace, knowing that she probably was dealing with some guilt, but she couldn’t tell Grace that she was fine, that she would be fine.
Too often, our best intentions can get in the way of good results. If you have a loved one who is moving to assisted living, even though you may feel guilty about suggesting it or encouraging them to make this move, it’s a good one. At some point, though, you need to let them settled into the facility, to get involved in things on their own.
Give them time and they will settle in. The facility also has staff members who are experienced at encouraging residents to get involved with their neighbors and other activities. Let go a bit when you feel you might be hanging on too tight.
For more information about Pipestone Place Assisted Living in San Antonio, TX or to take a tour, call today (210) 718-0211.
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